Late Night Theories

I try not to stay up past midnight anymore, but it’s a bit hard when there’s domestic abuse going on two feet away.

There’s something wrong with some of these Taiwanese women. Or with the men that’s making the women this way. It’s not like there’s a shortage of males to females, and I would know because I looked it up. (CIA Fact Book)

Today, on the very crowded MRT, a woman got on talking loudly on her cell phone and yelling at her boyfriend to return the money to her because she sold the house so it’s her money and even though she lent it to him, he still needs to RETURN IT. The entire MRT car, and probably the next one over, obtained all of this information throughout her conversation the entire time she was riding.

The lady across the hall yells and beats her boyfriend/escort/pimp (Who really knows what he is? Especially if he is so dumb or superficial to stick around after all the abuse? In my professional opinion: dude, grow a pair.) about once a week. She does it loudly, and it actually does border on insanity a bit, the kind where she really could use a padded room and straitjacket.

What I don’t understand is that if all of these women are so unsatisfied with what they got, then why don’t they go out and just get a new one? There are enough men for all of the women here on this island, and that’s NOT counting the foreigners. All they can do is bitch and moan about how these guys cheat on them or don’t do enough for them, OR they beat and scream at their “animals” with no mercy. (A while ago, during a fight, the lady across the hall kept calling her victim “你這個動物” (read: you’re such an animal) with an accompaniment of slapping sounds).

Come on, women, you can do better than that. If you don’t like the way he’s treating you, then MOVE ON. Live and be the “I am woman, hear me roar”! Trust me, you WILL find someone else, and he’ll be a hundred times better than the last one. Unless, you know, you enjoy going for the kind of guys who treat you like crap then you’re on your own.

I have even heard stories from American guys here about crazy Taiwanese ex-girlfriends who were jealous and possessive, and they would patrol facebook, email, MSN, etc. to ensure no other female contacts with their boyfriends.

Despite all of that, these women still insist on being high-maintenance. They would rather not cater to the guy, and if things aren’t perfect for them, then they really will lose their sh*t.

Come on, men, just because these women get all dressed up and pretty themselves up for you doesn’t mean that you have to put up with their crap. But also, don’t do anything stupid to deserve it in the first place.

So is it the men or the women? Is it years of unfaithful men and failed marriages that have bred the women to be like this? There are even many marriages here where the man is homosexual, but due to culture and tradition such as the need to carry on the family name, so there are infidelities and unhappy women all over the place. (I’m not making that up. I really do have a source.)

You know that phrase, “Crazy Asian Moms”? Well, I’m sure it started out as “Crazy Asian Girlfriends/Wives”. God forbid the lady across the hall to bear any children. Her children would definitely be abused to no end.

[Disclaimer: I’m not stereotyping that all Taiwanese or Asian women or men are like this. These are just examples from experience and observances.]

6 thoughts on “Late Night Theories

  1. Great post, Tina 🙂 I had no idea about this being so common for you to observe. My Taiwanese girlfriend is totally the opposite of what you described. Lucky me 🙂 You are so right what you say, why do these people stick together? Obviously it seems that the relationship doesn’t seem harmonious, I kinda hardly imagine two people loving each other and treating each other like that.

  2. Hi Tina…just recently picked up on your blog. I could really relate to this post. I am also an ABC who taught English in Taipei last year. Aside from the initial culture shock related to language, food, traffic, etc., I was rudely awakened by domestic disputes across the hall of my hotel room when I first arrived–and then when I moved to my apartment, both my neighborhoods on each side loved to have tearful shouting matches in the middle of the night. Unfortunately I don’t understand Taiwanese/Mandarin, but in all of these instances the women were always uber high pitched, repetitive, and often resulted to hitting or throwing things…while the men involved were calm and mumbled about 4 words to every 40 that were shouted. Another foreign teacher that I know also reported similar issues and we concluded that in general, abusive relationships are probably not all that different from the States–but it makes sense that we especially noticed it in a jam-packed city like Taipei, a city that is built with pretty thin walls. However, I agree with you that it seems that some of these women (I know, I’m generalizing a bit) are frustratingly fickle in that they just won’t leave these relationships that are causing them (and everyone within a 10 ft radius) so much anxiety. I don’t know what it is either. (btw this went on for 2-3 nights a week for all of 3 months before I finally decided to move out.)

  3. Taiwan is just so much more a traditional society, still with a lot of gender inequality. To me, people here just generally don’t seem know how to just calm down and be nice to each other in family relations. I think it’s some combination of unrealistic expectations of the men and discrimination towards women.
    Socially, things are changing pretty rapidly here and there’s a bit of a gap between the 50+ year mothers and their 20-40 year old daughters whose lives and marriages that they’re still trying to control more or less.

    Actually, it’s not just the young couples that shout at each others. It’s the older ones too – yeah, those that have been married for ages and already have grandchildren.

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